January 12, 2004

Well, here I sit as a passenger headed to KC. We got a little turned around somehow (how do you get lost in Joplin?). The Husbear dropped me off this morning at work (and he didn’t want me to leave!). No more trips for me for a while… I think me not being there is harder on him than it is on me, but it’s still rough to be gone for three weeks.

Until next time...
Erik

January 5, 2004

I’m getting ready for another trip for work–this time I’m going to Kansas City, MO for three weeks. I’ll be providing ISD (i.e., computer) support for the Wal-Mart Year End Meeting. The Husbear’s not to thrilled about the time I’ll be gone, but it’ll be over before he knows it. Not that I like being away from him, mind you. It’s just a good opportunity for me, and a nice change of pace. We’ll just have to see how well the Husbear can handle me being away…

Until next time...
Erik

December 28, 2003

Well, the mom-and-dad visit was interesting. Everything I thought would be said pretty much was:
that I’m living an abomination;
that it’s a sin against nature;
that I can change if I want to;
that they pray for me every day;
that I’m an embarrassment to them;
that they don’t want to tell anyone about me and they just dread someone will ask;
that there are groups that can help me to change;
that they will never acknowledge the Husbear as anything.

What’s sad (?) about the whole incident is the last one never acknowledging the Husbear] is the only thing that bothers me. I know these are their beliefs, and (for whatever reason) I respect that. I just wish they wouldn’t go pushing them down others’ throats! It took me wrestling with myself and what I was taught the first 20-some odd years of my life to get where I am today. And they tell me if I want to get out of this “life-style” they will help me. This is so not a life-style–it’s a life! It’s MY life! I just hope/wish one day they can/will acknowledge the person I love as just that–the person I love.

I’m not sure what my future relationship will be with my parents at this point, or if there will be a relationship… the Husbear and the kids are my family and come first.

Until next time...
Erik

December 27, 2003

After living in Arkansas for 12 years, my parents are coming to visit. They called a couple weeks ago to tell me, and they don’t want the Husbear or the kids around, and I’ve been “nervous” ever since. What is it about the parent-child bond that, even though I’m 30 years old, I’m still intimidated by the possibilities of what may happen?

Until next time...
Erik