And… last pro NOLA tip of the night: When that “social” app shows 42 people zero feet from you, there’s probably more than one floor in your hotel.

Pro NOLA tip: Just because you “can” fit into that speedo doesn’t mean you “should”.

Pro NOLA tip: if you’re dumb enough to hit your woman, don’t think I won’t find the police one street over and have you arrested.

Easy NOLA tip: if they’ve put the handcuffs on you, it’s probably too late to ask not to be arrested.