Yeah, I know the post title is pretty damned inconsiderate of me. Deal with it.
Today’s high was supposed to be 102 degrees. And someone left a baby in the car today here in Bentonville.
This occurred at the place I used to work, which I commonly called the OGRE. So more than likely I know this person. I wonder if he was overworked? (A definite “yes”.) Or maybe late for an early meeting or conference call? I’m sure he was distracted.
But that’s still no excuse.
The Bentonville Police Department is currently investigating the death of a 14-month-old girl who was left in a hot car.
…
Preliminary investigation revealed that the child was left locked in the father’s vehicle at his workplace, the David Glass Technology Center, which is located across the street from the day care.The outside temperature at the time of the report was 99 degrees, police said.
The child was enrolled at the day care, and it is further believed that the father failed to drop the child off prior to parking his vehicle at his workplace, police said.
Read the full story here.
I feel sad for what’s left of the family, but the whole incident pisses me off.
I had a whole big blog post going on in my head, but a comment over on Facebook by my buddy Sandy pretty much sums up all that I was thinking:
And people in Arkansas (cf. AR Act One) had the nerve to tell me that, as a gay man, I have no right raise a child? I am a gay father, bringing up a wonderful kid in a loving and caring environment that would never include baking him in a car. And yet I’m made to feel subpar. And this criminal, likely straight, harms his child in a negligent manner that anyone, gay or straight, with any common sense would know not to do? Sometimes I feel guilty when I am ashamed to call Arkansas home. Not this time.
The Husbear and I have raised three wonderful children who are now young adults. But yet, by law, we’re not allowed to have or raise our children.
For some reason Luke 6:41-42 comes to mind:
Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.
(See, I can pick and choose Bible verses too!)
Maybe it’s time “the majority” quits legislating what one group can do when they can’t even do it properly themselves.
Maybe “they” are afraid they might be shown up as inferior parents?
And people wonder why I’m all angry on the inside.
Addendum:
From the comments I’ve received here and on Facebook, I think people are misunderstanding my point.
I’m not saying that as a gay parent I’m perfect. However, with this law on the book, we’ll never know that now for many people.
While I feel sad for the family in question, the whole point is that crap like this happens all the time, to everyone, REGARDLESS of orientation. We’re all humans.
I do know the person in question. He was not a bad man, and was a good father from the interactions I had with him.
The main arguments used to promote and sell Act One to the general population was that unwed and gay people make bad parents. Therein lies my anger and frustration in situations like this. Why legislate discrimination against one group of persons when no one can “get it right” to begin with?
Until next time...
Welcome to my world.
I think being angry at “the majority”, “they”, is as much misplaced anger as anyone assuming a gay parent would for any reason be less of a parent. Developing an us vs them point of view drives the separation that causes conflict and or stalls the resolution. This is not about a straight guy comitting negligent homicide, this is about a father, a human being, failing to care for their own child with the most sickening results possible. If there is a place to target anger it is squarely on an individual, nothing else.
Well said, Erik. Had a weird nightmare about it. The “investigation into weather a crime was committed” still pisses me off. Its murder any way you slice it. I feel for his family. Just hope the justice system works.
I can think of no punishment worse then this man having to live with what he has done, that will eat at him like a cancer till the end of his days
It’s really unfortunate for the child- no kid should die from negligence like that.
But even worse- those people should never had a child to begin with
I can’t be angry at a parent that accidentally does something like this. All parents make mistakes, and sometimes they do result in death. For all you know, this person could have been a gay parent, or supported gay rights (like marriage and child rearing), this child could have been the only joy in his life at the moment, something he lived each day for; but to put the guy down over something like this without knowing what happened is closed minded also. I really feel for the guy, no matter what the circumstances, because this will weigh on his mind for the rest of his life. This might ruin many things in his life short term, but it will also be a nagging reminder forever for himself.
We, on the other hand, will forget this by next month (unless we personally know the guy, or find out he did it out of spite) and go on with our lives as if the child never existed.
From the comments I’ve received here and on Facebook, I think people are misunderstanding my point.
I’m not saying that as a gay parent I’m perfect. However, with this law on the book, we’ll never know that now for many people.
While I feel sad for the family in question, the whole point is that crap like this happens all the time, to everyone, REGARDLESS of orientation. We’re all humans.
I do know the person in question. He was not a bad man, and was a good father from the interactions I had with him.
The main arguments used to promote and sell Act One to the general population was that unwed and gay people make bad parents. Therein lies my anger and frustration in situations like this. Why legislate discrimination against one group of persons when no one can “get it right” to begin with?
(I added this as an addendum to the original post.)
So, unwed or gay parents (in the eyes of this law which I am unfamiliar with) are bad parents? So, this law should be followed by an absence of divorce for people with children, right? Oh, shit, wait, that would be discriminatory, and you can’t do that to fat white middle aged conservative white men that are attempting to protect the “institution of marriage”. So we should then just get rid if divorce all together. Right? No, they want freedom, privileges, and self-entitlement for all. That’s what the Pledge of allegiance is all about, I think.
Actually the few studies that have been done show the children of gays tend to be better adjusted.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ynews/20100607/hl_ynews/ynews_hl2434