The Stupid Evil Bastard Meme… with extra Snark!

Sorry I haven’t blogged in a bit. I have zero creativity for writing as of late. Zero. Enough that I thought of putting up a big “Gone Fishing” sign on my site.

But luckily I saw that Erik over at the electronic replicant did this meme. So I thought what the Hell. Mostly because I liked the title. Which I had to add a little more too.

I’ve been dripping with sarcasm and snark as of late, and just feeling fairly agro. I’m thinking my answers might reflect that a little.

1. What time did you get up this morning?
Get up as in “wake up”, or as in “get out of bed”? Those are two totally different things. I woke up at 8:30am, but didn’t manage to get out of bed until 10:45am. And I was alone the whole time.

2. How do you like your steak?
Tube.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?
I think it was “Pocahontas 3-D”. Oh wait, it was Avatar. Same difference.

4. What is your favorite TV show?
At this moment, I’m loving on “Doctor Who”, the reboot stuffs. It’s actually not bad, and very much in tune with the original BBC serials that I loved as a youngling. I didn’t start watching any of the reboot stuff until the last couple weeks, mostly because I was afraid they would destroy the fondness I had for the original. I was wrong.

5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?
For some odd reason, I have this odd thing about wanting to live in Australia. I think mostly because I’ve yet to see an ugly man from there.

6. What did you have for breakfast?
A Junior Deluxe Burger from Sonic. I know that’s technically a lunch item, but my breakfast-time is most people’s lunch-time. You saw what time I got up this morning.

7. What is your favorite cuisine?
Hot dogs. The cheap ones. Not the fake bright red ones though.

8. What foods do you dislike?
Anything with Bell Peppers in them. I’d rather lick twat. Well, not really. But that’s how much disdain I have for them.

9. Favorite Place to Eat?
At home. Because I don’t have to deal with people. And the food is always done the way I want it: without spit.

10. Favorite dressing?
To the left. Or did you mean salad dressing? In which case, I’d say a nice Balsamic Vinaigrette.

11.What kind of vehicle do you drive?
A Ford F-150 and a Toyota Prius. I bet you can’t guess which vehicle I picked out.

12. What are your favorite clothes?
One’s that keep my middle parts covered. I don’t like my middle parts. Actually, I don’t care for most of my 2000 parts.

13. Where would you visit if you had the chance?
Same answer as #5: Australia. Mostly because I’ve yet to see an ugly man from there. Hot!

14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full?
I never played any sports that required me to wear a cup. But it would have been 1/2 full if I would have had to wear one.

15. Where would you want to retire?
See #5 and #13: Australia. Because I’ve yet to see an ugly man from there.

16. Favorite time of day?
13:37. (I think three of you who read this might get that.)

17. Where were you born?
Out from between some municipally cock-washed beef curtains. I think. I don’t think I was a test tube baby.

18. What is your favorite sport to watch?
Horn blowing. And by horn, I mean…..

19. Who do you think will never call you again?
That’s a long list. Mostly consisting of family members. And I’m okay with that.

20. Person you expect to call you next?
I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really hate talking on the telephone. But it will probably be the Husbear.

21. Who are you most curious about their responses to Stealing?
Actually I wonder if anyone reads these things anymore.

22. Bird watcher?
I watch for birds flying over me to make sure they aren’t going to shit on me. That happened once. Only once.

23. Are you a morning person or a night person?
Totally night. Whoever heard of giving a tattoo at 8am? Plus people seem to usually be pretty bitchy in the morning.

24. Do you have any pets?
µ and m, the kittehs. And Sophie, the dog. We also have many pea fowl and chickens, but I don’t consider them pets.

25. Any new and exciting news you’d like to share?
I haven’t killed anyone.

26. What did you want to be when you were little?
An astronaut. Exploring Uranus.

27. What is your best childhood memory?
Those memories have been deleted to make room for my mental porn collection. Because that’s really what will keep me warm when I’m old.

28. Are you a cat or dog person?
Totally a cat person. Dogs have got to be the dumbest creatures I’ve ever met. But they both taste like chicken.

29. Are you married?
No. Being with the same person for 13+ years will apparently somehow destroy society if we are legally allowed to get married. As opposed to all the people who are allowed to and can’t make it work and get divorced and remarried multiple times.

30. Always wear your seat belt?
Yes. Because a shattered pelvis is so much better than more head trauma. Because I’ve already had enough of that.

31. Been in a car accident?
Many. Although I can’t think of any where I was at fault.

32. Any pet peeves?
People acting like dicks just because they’re in a tattoo studio, because they think that’s acceptable behavior. I *will* smack you down.

33. Favorite Pizza Toppings?
Pepperoni and Onion.

34. Favorite Flower?
All the dead ones.

35. Favorite ice cream?
Blue Bunny’s “Bunny Tracks”. Best shit ever.

36. Favorite fast food restaurant?
Sonic.

37. How many times did you fail your driver’s test?
Who says I ever passed it?

38. Who did you get your last email from?
Apple. Evil bastards want me to buy something.

39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
That’s what got me in trouble when I was in college. Never going to ever happen again. Someone else’s credit card, that’s a different story. I could max out a card at Best Buy.

40. Do anything spontaneous lately?
I got a facial. 😉

41. Like your job?
Love it. Except for when I’m not feeling creative, like at this moment. Which is why I’m doing this meme. It’s hard to force creativity.

42. Broccoli?
What the hell? Is that a question? Where did you go to school? I’m betting America.

43. What was your favorite vacation?
I’d say this last trip to New Orleans.

44. Last person you went out to dinner with?
The Husbear.

45. What are you listening to right now?
At the studio we keep it on Sirius/XM’s First Wave. Currently “Town Called Malice” by The Jam is playing.

46. What is your favorite color?
I really don’t have a favorite. I’ve never been a fan of browns or greens. Blues and reds tend to be my favorite shades though.

47. How many tattoos do you have?
I really need to blog about that. I’ve lost count.

48. How many times have you tagged someone to do a meme?
I quit doing that. I found other ways to be evil.

49. What time did you finish this meme?
When I hit the publish button.

50. Coffee Drinker?
Not out of habit. Unless there’s alcohol in it.

Until next time...
Erik

14 thoughts on “The Stupid Evil Bastard Meme… with extra Snark!

  1. You are so Leet. You don’t even know how Leet you are.

    I must say, I’m a bit disappointed that I’m not allowed to be a dick in your tattoo studio. The thought of being a condescending asshole in a tattoo parlor is the primary reason I want to visit one (even more so than actually getting a tattoo).

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